Dear future me,
I hope you are happy. I hope whatever brings who I am now to who you are, who I will be makes me stronger even though there are moments where I know I will feel broken and that I can’t be fixed no matter how hard I try. I hope you figured out some of the things I have no idea where to start on. I hope you didn’t let petty things get in the way of your friendships but I hope I’ve learned to cut people out who don’t deserve me. I hope I know my value when I get to be you because right now I’m struggling with it.
I wonder if we have the same questions about life even if we have different priorities. Do you still fear that everyone secretly hates you? Do you wonder if you really ever fit somewhere? Are you any closer to what you want deep down that you are afraid of saying out loud because if you do then you are giving away a part of your dreams to people who could crush it with a few words? Do you dream of your next vacation or do you dream or the few experiences that you have had the honor of having?
I have to admit as much as it scares me that I don’t know you or what happens to me, I am excited to spend to see what takes me to you. I cant say I don’t expect stumbling because that’s what I am doing know. I have goals that I want to reach and I wonder if you’ve seen yourself get their or give up. I want to live somewhere else, experience a new way of live, meet new people. I want to meet those who inspire me to be a stronger person, I want to grab lunch at someone’s favorite joint in town when I am on vacation to see them, sneak chocolates from my purse as I lay under the stars as I spent time with people for the first time. I hope you’ve experience all these things.
It’s weird to think that I know you but I have no idea. Maybe it shouldn’t because you’re still me. You’re just a part of me that I have discovered, a new version of myself that followed a path I haven’t come across. I find a strange sense of calm when I think about who you are- who I become because there is a lot of room between where you are and where I am. There is a lot to be discovered on the map of my life between the place marked beginning where my feet stand as I pen a letter to you and the question which marked the spot that you take on the map.
Thank you for clearing the path for me and forging on even when you felt like giving up.
Tessa- age 23.